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By the time you learn the rules of life, you’re too old to play the game.127. Does time fly when you’re having sex or was it really just one minut...?128. If you’re looking for sympathy, you’ll find it in the dictionary between “shit” and “syphilis”129. Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?130. Keep the dream alive: Hit the snooze button.131. I don’t have a beer gut, I have a protective covering for my rock hard abs.132. Build a man a fire, and he’ll be. She had four younger sisters, Alice 3, Amy 5, Alexandra 7 and Adrian 11. Both of her parents had matching haircuts to symbolize there “togetherness” and they were one hundred percent against dishwashers. Apparently they created laziness and killed traditional methods. Annie hated how strange her family was, and there was only one other person in her crazy home who agreed with her, her older brother Ryan. He was 18 when I was first introduced to him, and instantly I recognized that he was the. You’re very funny. When you come up with one of those great quips, do you analyze the preceding syntax and context? Do you sift through all the implications and determine which would make the best philosophical, political or sociological humor?’ ‘Are you making fun of the way I talk?’ he asked. ‘Yes. Or does it just happen by instinct?’ ‘I just do it. It’s instinct.’ ‘There you have it. I just wanted to express what I was feeling.’ I nearly added, ‘about you.’ ‘It was intense. It was exactly. “Yes, thank you. I’m so sorry. Good bye.”In a moment the phone was hung up, forgotten, and mom was on her knees holding me. I remained latched to my own knees. Oddly, not a single tear had fallen from my eyes. I really felt like crying, but I wasn’t there yet. I was floating on some cloud in my mind, where none of it was real.“Oh, Jacob, I’m so sorry,” mom cried into my neck, holding me tight.“What’s wrong?” dad asked, just walking into the room.“Give me a second, Johnathan,” mom said in the.
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