From a back room we could hear the sound of pool balls being played. “ Come on” said Stu, “I fancy a game”. Taking our drinks with us we...went into the games room. There were dartboards on either side and in the middle a single pool table. Round the walls were rough seats, planks on drinks boxes. There were only two players, both in their thirties; a wiry black haired tattooed man and a slightly plump woman. They were just starting a new game, she was breaking and as I looked at her hands. “A lot has changed! HIV wasn’t in the straight, non-drug-using community. Heck, I’d never even heard of AIDS in 1981! I only knew one person to have an STD in High School. And mostly a good dose of antibiotics solved the problem in the past. Now? I’d have a tough time being with anyone who hadn’t been tested.”Jackie looked at me with a mirthful smile, “Your wives still let you play around?”“Within certain limits,” I said.“Interesting. Anyway, Penny said she’d talk to you in a few days. She’s. I wondered if it were mutual. From far away, I heard voices whisper, ‘Yes.’ My nurses arrived half and hour later. I was sitting at the table. My mind was in a confused loop about my dinner guests. I was trying to decide what was spoken, what was imagined, what was real, what was their practiced skill with men and what was given freely to me. I needed the distraction. The nurses were comfortable with me and playful tonight. ‘Naughty boy. Did you play with yourself and get all stickly? Are you. She came into our bedroom where I do my work from during one of her breaks. She wants me to get rid of most of my books because I’m not smart enough to understand them anymore. Not my fiction collection, but my hard and soft sciences and language, theology books. I couldn’t even argue the point. I told her I was going to keep some for sentimental reasons. It made me cry. I had to get off the phones for a few minutes. I had built so much of my self image around my intelligence. My ability to.
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